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Awkward Conversations: My b/f wants a naked pic of me. What do I say?

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Last updated: 30/07/2020

Welcome to the third instalment in our Awkward Conversations series.

Awkward Conversations is an IMPACT Community Services' initiative where we explore some of the challenging issues happening in homes across the region.

Today we look at technology and youth and an area that could lead to potential embarrassment down the track.

Awkward Conversations: Should I move to Brisbane to look for work?

Awkward Conversations: The right age for a child to have a smartphone

We’ve sought advice from specialist IMPACT staff in the areas of youth and family support to formulate the following hypothetical conversation. We recognise each case is different and needs to be assessed on its own merits, but hope this adds something of value if you or someone you know finds themselves in this situation.

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Teenager: "My boyfriend sometimes tries to get a photo of me naked and keeps asking me to send him a sexy shot of myself.  He says all his mates’ girlfriends do it and I’m just being uptight.  What do I say?"

Friend: "Hey, it's your body, your mind and your right to say what you are comfortable with and not comfortable with.  The danger of having photos of you naked in someone else’s phone means you no longer have control over where that photo ends up, or who sees it. 

"From your message it sounds like he gets to see you naked and I am pretty sure he's got a pretty good memory so why the pressure for X-rated photos?  Do he and his mates share or swap girlfriend pictures with each other?  That’s against the law and not valued in our culture for a reason. 

"If that’s not good enough for your boyfriend, then you might have to protect yourself and your future self by flicking him into cyberspace without you, pictures included.

"If you do feel comfortable sending him a nude photo, maybe just crop out your face or any identifying features to protect your identity if the relationship ends."

Are you aged between 15 and 24 and in need of support on your employment journey? Click here to find out how we can help

Make sure you keep an eye out as we explore more important topics in coming weeks.  Our responses are purely hypothetical; each person's case will be different and what might be the right decision for one person may not be for another.

We’d love to hear from you if you’ve got a question you would like us to delve into.  Simply share a comment on our Facebook page, or if it’s something you would prefer to keep confidential, email awratten@impact.org.au

Please note: This website may contain references to, or feature images, videos, and voices of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples who have passed away.

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